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Quote of the day:
"Beside, 't is known he could speak Greek
As naturally as pigs squeak;
That Latin was no more difficile
Than to a blackbird 't is to whistle.
He could distinguish and divide
A hair 'twixt south and southwest side.
For rhetoric, he could not ope
His mouth, but out there flew a trope.
For all a rhetorician's rules
Teach nothing but to name his tools.
A Babylonish dialect
Which learned pedants much affect.
'T was Presbyterian true blue.
And prove their doctrine orthodox,
By apostolic blows and knocks.
As if religion was intended
For nothing else but to be mended.
Compound for sins they are inclined to,
By damning those they have no mind to.
He ne'er consider'd it, as loth
To look a gift-horse in the mouth.
And bid the devil take the hin'most.
I 'll make the fur
Fly 'bout the ears of the old cur.
These reasons made his mouth to water.
Love is a boy by poets styl'd;
Then spare the rod and spoil the child.
For truth is precious and divine,--
Too rich a pearl for carnal swine.
To swallow gudgeons ere they 're catch'd,
And count their chickens ere they 're hatch'd.
There 's but the twinkling of a star
Between a man of peace and war.
What makes all doctrines plain and clear?
About two hundred pounds a year.
And that which was prov'd true before
Prove false again? Two hundred more.
With crosses, relics, crucifixes,
Beads, pictures, rosaries, and pixes,--
The tools of working our salvation
By mere mechanic operation.
He that complies against his will
Is of his own opinion still.
And poets by their sufferings grow,--
As if there were no more to do,
To make a poet excellent,
But only want and discontent.
[Miscellaneous Quotations]"
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