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Quote of the day
" Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
Marriage is an institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
All marriages are happy; it's the living together afterward that causes all the problems.
Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do... but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did.
My wife and I have a perfect understanding; I don't try to run her life and I don't try to run mine.
The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature. The new theory is that men don't mature. So you might as well marry a younger one.
Marriage: A ceremony in which rings are put on the finger of the lady and through the nose of the gentleman.
[Herbert Spencer]
Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
[Scottish Proverb]
One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: "Give little, give seldom, and above all, give grudgingly." Otherwise, what could have been a proper marriage could become an orgy of sexual lust.
[Ruth Smythers, Marriage advice for women, 1894]
In olden times, sacrifices were made at the altar, a practice which is still very much practiced.
[Helen Rowland]
Someone once asked me why women don't gamble as much as men do and I gave the commonsensical reply that we don't have as much money. That was a true but incomplete answer. In fact, women's total instinct for gambling is satisfied by marriage.
[Gloria Steinem]
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
[Lana Turner]
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
[Mae West]
Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before marriage, which is never advisable.
[Oscar Wilde]
Why are women so much more interesting to men than men are to women?
[Virginia Woolf]
Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished.
[Goethe]
If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve them.
[Robert Graves]
If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.
[Katherine Hepburn]
Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.
[Katherine Hepburn]
Wedding is destiny, and hanging likewise.
[John Heywood]
Love is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.
[Lisa Hoffman]
Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything in the house.
[Jean Kerr]
Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose.
[F. M. Knowles]
Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth.
[John Lyly]
For the memory of love is sweet, though the love itself were in vain. And what I have lost of pleasure, assuage what I find of pain.
[Lyster]
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
[Groucho Marx]
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does.
[Groucho Marx]
Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands... but English women only hope to find in their butlers.
[W. Somerset Maugham]
Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
[Jackie Mason]
Man is a natural polygamist. He always has one woman leading him by the nose and another hanging on to his coattails.
[H. L. Mencken]
We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart.
[H.L. Mencken]
Love is the delusion that one man or woman differs from another.
[H. L. Mencken]
Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out.
[Montaigne]
A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.
[Montaigne]
To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up.
[Ogden Nash]
No woman marries for money; they are all clever enough, before marrying a millionaire, to fall in love with him first.
[Cesare Pavese]
[Misc. marriage quotations]"
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